Happy 4th of July!

It's almost like mother nature knows it's 4th of July weekend. It's gorgeous outside right now. Lynn and I went for a walk down at the beach around 7:30 this morning and no fog, not a cloud in site! The water was glassy and it was so beautiful I almost cried. I love this holiday. It just reminds me of carefree summertime, you know, back when school was out and you didn't have a worrie in the world? I also love all the flag waving and community events. The pier has flags waving all the way to the end, so cool. Then you get to top it off with friends, bbq's, and fireworks! I still ooooh and awe at the fireworks and I know this makes me a nerd, but I love the music too....Sousa's Stars and Strips Forever and the good ole Star Spangled Banner....makes me smile!
So, you can probably tell that I got a little better sleep last night. The night before I decided to try to sleep without help from a pain reliever and it didn't work too well. I woke up about 10 times during the night. Very uncomfortable. Made for a bit of grouchy day yesterday. So, last night, I was dog tired (I have 3 dogs snoring at my feet right now) and decided I needed one of those V pills. Worked like a charm and I slept till about 5:30 this morning. The really raw area is starting to heal a bit and other areas are crusting pretty bad. The constant pain is subsiding a bit and now it's just when I move certain ways. All very good news. Oh yeah, I forgot to share that I haven't had radiation all week. When I went in on Wednesday, the doc looked and said no way, need to heal more. So, I'm going back Tuesday and will probably finish the boosts then. I think I have 6-7 more to go.
I'm off. Need to get over to the city to pull some copies of permits on a house. Tomorrow is Jesse's 15th birthday. He's requested some of mamma's homemade mac and cheese so I need to pick up a few things at the grocery store too.
Remember to look around, there are so many beautiful things to see. And remember to enjoy every minute. Have a wonderful 4th everyone!

May I Have Another?

Time for an update, right? It's been a while, I know. I've been busy trying to get my real estate business back on track and it's taking a TON of energy. There are a bunch of things running through my head pertaining to the current state of our economy, but my sarcastic ways would just be too much. So, instead, I'll focus those thoughts on an update about my personal Chernobal disaster. I've been asked alot lately about how it feels and how I'm doing. I've also had some refer to it as a really bad sunburn. My thoughts on the sunburn theory are "Not so much, unless you are habitating on the sun". Instead, I liken it to having someone pour gasoline on me and then light me on fire. Of course, directly after this, the gasoline toting fire dudette asks me if she can do it again. Being the brainiac I am, I answer, "of course, what time would you like me to be there?".
Anyway, after taking a break from radiation on Thursday and Friday of last week, I went in for a check on Monday. I didn't even have to persuade the doc to give me a break this time. He wrapped it for me and told me to go take a couple more days off. So, today I go back in. I can't imagine taking anymore radiation, but what the heck do I know. The skin is completely gone in a hand size area. It needs air, but if I don't keep it covered, my clothes stick to the area. I've had to use pain killers to sleep at night. I know this will be over soon, but it's not soon enough for me. As 3pm approaches today, I know my anxiety level will be increasing too. I think I'm definitely ready to accept the consequences of not finishing these last 6-7 boosts..........

Hittin' a Wall

Hittin' a wall today.....a big red, raw, blisterry wall! I am tired, and as much as I try to ignore it, it hurts. I passed my radiation oncologist on my way in today and told him I needed to see him before I went into the frydaddy. After looking at it he offered a long weekend of soaks and burn cream. So, I came home to my recliner this afternoon and I haven't moved since......so tired. Its 7:30 and the kids are just now eating. I've been doing most of the cooking lately, but this last week I am totally running out of gas way before I get to the kitchen. I think the walking in the morning and working the rest of the day is tanking me. I also had an appointment yesterday and my blood counts are getting really low again.

John is taking over....he's just a bit late in his delivery.....sitting here in my recliner waiting for someone to feed me takes alot of energy!

TGIF!

I arrived for my daily session right on time, as usual. And, as usual, I had something sarcastic to add as I walked into the radiation room. For some reason, she took my "crispy fried chicken" comment seriously today and went to get the doc after looking at the area. A few minutes later the doc came strolling in with what looked like a ukulele around his neck. Maybe not a ukulele, but I can't think of the name of that other small guitar. It was on the tip of my tongue.....I tried googling, but I still can't come up with the name. Dang chemo brain still plagues me! As he strummed, he looked at the area and then looked at the tech and said, "looks good". Not sure what she said at that point, but I decided to chime in with "no more bolus, right?". I guess he agreed, because he looked back at her and said, "no more bolus". She smiled and said, "that's why I came to get you." So, a little good news for this Friday........no more bolus, dangit!
So, now that I've told you that story, it occurred to me that you might not have any idea what I'm talking about. What the heck is a bolus? And, why can I remember the name of this stupid matt that is burning the crap out of me and not that little guitar thingy?

Bolus, a flabby, rubbery material, is used to 'fool' the radiation beam so it will deposit the maximum dose on the skin surface instead of a fraction of an inch deeper, as it would otherwise. Therefore, a skin reaction is almost inevitable in this scenario.

Ok, now you can find new ways to add your new vocabulary word into conversation. And, on that note, I think I'll sign off and go enjoy the current feeling of being able to fry an egg on my head!

Tawnilicious!

Our Miss Tawnni is graduating from high school tomorrow. We are so proud of her and looking forward to seeing her get that diploma! We wish her lot's of love, happiness, and a little success thrown in there, just to make it all a little easier. So, in case you are keeping score, that will be 2 in college, one in high school, one in middle school, and one going in to the second grade (and the 4 lazy, hairy ones that lay around the house all day)!
I've been cooking all morning so that we don't have to eat junk food on our trip and so Kyla and Jesse will have something easy to make while we are at the graduation. I made 2 lasagnas and 2 quiches (is quiche already plural?) and I've got beans and spanish rice to make chalupas tonight. Ran out of cheese, though, so need to stop by the store on the way back from my beloved rads.
Now, I must go.....gotta give myself a quick pedicure so Tawnni's friends don't think she invited her back woods grandpa to the graduation! Oh yeah, forgot to mention the good news from yesterday......baby eyelashes!!!!

Hot Dogs and Apple Pie

I'm headed out for number 20 in just a bit. Lot's of color, but no skin break down yet, just the little purple blisters under the skin. I used to tan really easy when I was a kid, so I'm hoping my skin holds up well to all this. They are still using a bolus every day, which is meant to intensify the dose to the skin, so I'm guessing I won't get out of this in my current state. Although, I'm still completely numb under my arm so if that's where the skin decides to break down, I won't be able to feel it. Just trying to think positive here.....

Feeling better today. It was a cold virus I was getting on Friday. Still stuffy, but not as sluggish and achy. Could be that I've been away from the radiation for a couple of days, though.

Did you see the latest news? It was Weiner's weiner. I'm sooooo shocked! Deja vu struck me in a "I did not have sex with that woman" kinda way. It's time to rev up election headquarters Sam!

Dorkomatics!

I've been playing Immunity Roulette for the past month or so and it finally caught up to me. I was feeling so good, and had sooooo much to do that I must have forgotten to refill my hand sanitizer. Or maybe I should have been wearing a mask......because I love looking like a freak! On a freak note, have you ever felt like someone was staring at you, but when you look at them, they look away. Happens alot these days. Must be my smile because I don't usually go out in public in my Hooters tshirt ;-)

Anyway, had a low grade fever yesterday, along with alot of aches. Doc thinks it just a virus because my immune system is still a bit compromised. My white blood counts were still low last week and doc thinks it's a combination of the bone marrow not recovering yet from the chemo and from the radiation to my chest area compromising it.

So, with the tan turning to a distinct rosy color and whatever this irritating virus is, I'm back to shuffling. Not quite to my 90 yr old chemo self, but I think I could pass for 72 easily if you witnessed me trying to get out of my recliner! I'm hoping it's temporary, cause I'm kinda partial to picking up my feet when I walk. Yesterday, John and I went to Roman's school picnic. We got there a few minutes early and alot of the parents were waiting outside the classroom. I got that distinct feeling that everyone was staring at the little old bald man shuffling by (me). Once I sat down, I was overcome with emotion.....not sure what it was, but I think it had to do with being soooooo sick of being sick and wanting to be out and about mixing it up like I always have without people feeling sorry for me. Anyway, the feeling passed quickly and then the kids came out to have their picnic with the parents. Romie came out with that big goofy smile of his and everything was all good again. Well, almost everything. I am usually up early and make sure Romie is dressed and has a good breakfast and I pack his lunch. I was feeling yuck that morning, and I didn't pack his lunch because I knew we were going to have lunch with him. So, John had gotten him some breakfast and walked him to the bus stop. Anyway, Roman was wearing his shirt backwards and his pants were just about falling down because he didn't have a belt on.......We had a nice little chuckle that I'm going to need to stick around to make sure the two of them don't go out in public looking like dorks every day. I'm good with that!